UVA Men’s Blue
Wherever the deans haven’t thought to look for us yet.
We wanted to be in CoRec, but our wives wouldn’t let us.
AJ Swartwood and Rick Eberstadt
Spencer’s Sweet Boot
|Team 90s TV Show||
The Clinton Hearings
Proud To Be An American
|Distance to Charlottesville, VA||
Actually, most of us just sleep in the shed behind Copeley field.
|AJ “The Magic Man” Swartwood (3L – Captain)
Rick “You Down With OBP?” Eberstadt (3L – Captain)
Ben “Pitcher Slayer” Behrendt (3L)
Alexander “Yes More Mr. Nice Guy” Hoffarth (3L)
Chris “Monster” Giusto (2L)
Jake “Dr. J” Mihalkanin (2L)
Austin “Who’s Your Daddy” Westerberg (2L)
Jordan “The Silent Killer” Beals (1L)
Christian “Crash Test” Berger (1L)
Collin “Florida Hot” Hunt (1L)
Spencer “He’s Got Wheels” Ryan (1L)
Whoever kills Rick if he sends out one more email.
|Law Review Nerds||
Thankfully none. Alexander’s in the J.D./M.B.A. program and that’s already too close for comfort.
About to be made.
1) Watching UVA athletics to learn stress-management.
2) Curls and push-ups at North Grounds. Lower body is for quitters.
3) Running away from professors who see us after we skipped their class.
4) NOT PLAYING BASKETBALL.
5) Testing our reflexes by standing anywhere near the infield when Ben’s hitting.
|Want To Play Against||
UVA Men’s Orange (R.I.P.)
|DON’T Want To Play Against||
Also UVA Men’s Orange (R.I.P.)
|Favorite Thing About The Tournament||
Underdog stories. (Look no further)
|The Tournament Would Be More Awesome If||
The losing team were forced to sing the winning team’s school fight song.
|Rick Eberstadt is our resident Washington insider, political expert, and debate specialist who we send out to dispute any questionable calls with the officiating crews. This Double Hoo got bored with classes years ago, and his visits to the library these days consist entirely of scouting and analyzing softball sabermetric data. He’s a practicing catholic, but his teammates are starting to worry that he’ll officially convert to his new-found religion of ‘walks and line drives.’
AJ Swartwood is the emotional heart and soul of the team, a position he earned by crushing the ‘sweetest beard’ contest in spring training. He’s your best friend off the field and your worst nightmare on it, dropping the most casual moonshots Copeley field has ever seen. Don’t let his California-surfer demeanor lull you into a false sense of security: the only thing hotter than his bat, is his wife.
Ben Behrendt, the pride of Iowa, came into his 3L year hungry for a ring. He got to work on honing his oppo power, decided to captain half the teams in the law school, and quickly tried to eliminate the competition during BP. He’s hoping his path to the championship ends by taking home the hardware with Men’s Blue, and he’ll bring however many bats it takes to make it happen.
Alexander Hoffarth crunches softball numbers almost as quickly as he crunches at the North Grounds gym. The man was born in cargo shorts and sunglasses, filling out the player-coach role as well as anybody since Pete Rose (and is rumored to have taken the odds on this team in tourney). His Catholic bonafides are the stuff of legend, but the only thing he’s gonna need to be confessing to Father Softball is the number of pitches he’s murdered.
The only father (that we know of) on the squad, Austin Westerberg’s power comes in large part from the task of carrying his impossibly cute and chubby infant daughter. When he’s not earning that Dad of the Year mug from our youngest fan, he spends his time unsuccessfully pretending that he didn’t play college baseball. This Boise native came to UVA Law to mash two things, and he’s all out of potatoes.
The only thing tighter than Chris Giusto’s game on the field are his stylish skinny jeans off of it. This towering UChicago alum could beat fellow Chicagoan Kris Bryant in a fight, a home run derby, and a look-alike contest all in the same evening. But don’t be fooled by the softness of his beard; this tough-as-nails giant will rip the ball either over the fence or straight through it.
With Illinois ice water in his veins, Jake Mihalkanin is the calm clutch presence that every good team needs. His smooth nature is matched only by his equally smooth swing and Baez-like glovework at second. This jack of all trades will beat you in any sport he wants to, and today he’s decided it’s going to be softball.
Fan favorite Christian Berger has enough range to cover the whole outfield by himself, but he decided he wants to give other people a chance to make highlight-reel catches too. This all-American boy will literally run through walls for his team. The only thing more dangerous than Christian with a glove is Christian with a bat; and it’s possible that even he wouldn’t be able to catch the line drive shots he’ll rip this weekend.
Jordan Beals made waves in the 1L Fall semester with his deadly swing and crazy speed. This Seattle University Golfer spent years learning how to murder a ball, and it shows every time he steps up to the plate. He lets his bat do the talking for him: and as your outfielders will soon discover, it has a lot to say.
Collin Hunt is a rare softball talent with the tools of Manny Machado and the swagger to match. Throwing fireballs on the field and draining fireballs off it, this Florida kid wound up in Charlottesville because he mistook the acronym “UVA” for greek letters that he hadn’t come across yet. Though it’s usually colder in Virginia than it is at FGCU, Collin swings a hot enough bat to turn the temperature up and make Copeley feel more like home.
Spencer Ryan learned his big swinging ways in New York, and then picked up his softball smarts studying at Princeton. His moonshots have struck fear in the hearts of many a driver and pedestrian along Massie Road during batting practice. Fortunately for the rest of the teams in the tournament, the Softball Gods have decided to make things a little more fair by breaking his foot before show time – but even in a boot, he’d win the home run derby if he felt like it.